I think I should stop watching re- runs of F.R.I.E.N.D.S.

Being a F.R.I.E.N.D.S. fan can be troublesome sometimes. Imagine you’re in a grim or formal environment, and you’re supposed to be serious, but suddenly you begin to laugh, because all you can think of is :
– Smelly cat, smelly cat, what are they feeding you?
– Joey doesn’t share food!!
– I’m chandler, could I BE wearing any more clothes?
– oh my eyes! my eyes!
– how you doin?

*sighs*

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Just insomniac things.

It’s 6 in the morning and I am not yet able to sleep. All I’m thinking is about food and how to score well in exams without studying. Food reminds me of Joey, and remember, Joey doesn’t share food! Right now, I’m desperately craving for french fries. Wait, why are they called so? I must google it. I have no idea why am I blabbering such ridiculous stuff here, but this feels so right. This is my blog so I can write whatever I want, right?
Well, I think I should do this more often. I always have tons of things to talk about, irrespective of whether people are interested to listen to them or not.
Good night peeps! (Good morning in India).

Summers are here.

winter-summer-hot-complain-seasonal-ecards-someecards

Summers are here. The worst part of the day is morning when the maid comes and switches off the fan while you’re sleeping. If she doesn’t switch it on after she’s done, it is her cruel way to take some kind of revenge from you.

Story of every student studying English Literature.

Oh well. This totally comes from my personal experience.

1. Reading a poem or a novel is all hunky – dory, until you’re asked to explain it, analyse it and perform an in – depth postmortem on it.

2. We tend to forget our own name in the process of memorizing the name of different characters present in the countless plays and novels prescribed in our syllabus.

3. ‘Romantic’ poetry didn’t turn out as we expected it to be. It’s not even close to the word ‘love’. This is the most shattered expectation of a student newly introduced to the world of literature.

4. Shakespeare is not the only one who haunts us. There are many more spirits like him.

5. We can’t survive without the help books, in any way.

6. We are expected to be a living dictionary by our friends, family and relatives.

7. We are required to remember the name of each book written by each and every author present over the 700 year long history of English literature, esp if we are preparing for entrance exams. *cries*

8. We have the unrestricted opportunity of reading extremely abusive and sensuous poetry without anyone condemning us, because it’s prescribed in our syllabus. *devilish smile* 😀

In most of the cases, the content is so hilarious, it just becomes another source of our jokes and comical conversations.

9. We possess the talent of providing a poetic flavour to a simple concept or object.

10. We spend countless hours trying to figure out “How the hell could/did he write this?”

Mind your own business aunty, please. (Repost)

It’s a repost with some additional characteristics of the aunties 😀

It seems these ladies are born to keep an eye on their neighbour’s home. And they do it so well! They are always more concerned about their pados ke ghar – what have they cooked for dinner, where they are headed to, or how their washing powder provides an immaculate whiteness to their T-shirts. These types of species have an inborn talent of spying.  She would be knowing each and every detail of what’s happening in your home, without your knowledge! I wish I too possessed this awesome talent of spying, so that I’d know what question papers are being set by our teachers for exam, you know. Or maybe these aunties themselves have some mystical powers due to which they can observe the happenings of your home in a big crystal ball. It is also possible that she might have installed a secret camera in one of the flower pots in your home. Or she might be having an alien creature resembling Jaadu , Which impeccably does the work of spying for her.

When your door bell rings, she rushes to peek through her window. She always keeps an eye on who visits your home, and then would make guesses about the identity of the visitor. It keeps troubling her if she’s not able to guess it correctly. As a tactful woman, she would intentionally come to your home in the name of asking for sugar, tomato or milk. Reason? She wants to know who visited your home in the morning. She would involve you in her talks so cunningly that she’ll make you reveal the much needed info about that visitor. And then she calms down.

Oh, and how can we forget their basic art of spreading rumours! “You know I heard ___’s daughter talking on phone with a guy. I saw ___’s son hanging out with a girl. I think there’s cooking something between them.” Every aunty listens to the piece of gossip, adds her own twist to it, and passes on to the next until it becomes a sensational topic of your area.

She notices every single detail of the attire your mother wears. Millions of questions would collide in her mind about the dress –  the stuff it is made up of, at what price she bought it, from where she bought it and why she (aunty) never came across such a piece. She will always have a loyal liking towards your mum’s clothes. She would inquire everything about the piece and then would picture herself in that dress. But she will not get the same dress stitched for her fearing that her padosan (neighbour) will accuse her of copying her dress.

They are everywhere! There’s absolutely no escaping them. Try hiding from them at public places or gatherings – they WILL find you out. And if she’s a Punjabi, well, I don’t need to describe that. Everyone knows!

The most annoying habit of these pados ki aunties is the way they talk. Actually they don’t talk, they Scream!  She would talk merrily about what her husband gifted her, from where she got her imported lipstick and other pompous matters – ignoring the fact that the children may be studying, sleeping or facebooking (even that needs a calmer atmosphere). She would lower her tone as soon as she starts to gossip about another padosan, because even walls can hear, you know. “Mrs. Sharma fought with her husband yesterday” and then she would elaborate the voices she heard coming out of their home.

It’s hard to ignore them. Everytime you see her, you’ve to greet her saying “Namastey“, while in your head you might be saying “Aa gyi firse” (there she comes again). You have to maintain your etiquettes in front of her because who knows she might make an issue out of it!  “Mrs. ____ ke bachon ko toh tameez hi nahi hai” (Mrs ____’s children absolutely have no manners) , she might declare it in front of other aunties. She can prove dangerous for your family ki izzat (reputation). Beware, people!
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The writer is feeling relieved after venting out her frustration on her blog. She hopes that none of her aunt comes across this piece of bashing against them. 😉

I suffered a Heartbreak.

That one pair of heels you’ve always wished to have. Those for whom you’ve searched every possible affordable place. One day, you come across THE SAME on an online shopping site. Your heart begins to palpitate out of sheer joy. Upon visualizing yourself in those heels embellishing your dress, your eyes glow with a buoyant delight. After a long gaze at the screen, you proceed to the size chart to confirm your foot size only to realize the heels are out of stock. 😦